Nov 19, 2009

thanks, cav daily

for your brilliant insights into the "realities" of gender difference. thanks for regurgitating the most un-helpful sentiments that men and women are fundamentally different.


for those of you who may have missed this stroke of brilliance the original article is here.
there were also two good letters to the editor in response.

begin my thoughts:
first reason I think this is terrible-
it has zero logic. you observe something and take it at face value, not thinking about what other factors are at work. simply because most 18-22 year olds who live in a microcosm of a world seem the same doesn't mean they all are. no one likes to be stereotyped and i'm sure there are lots of sorority girls and frat guys who are upset by being defined by the brands they wear. i'm skimming over the problems with this last point- class and race issues because i thought they were covered well in the other two responses.

second-
this narrative of the "battle of the sexes" or the over-arching assumption of gender difference is not helpful for forming any kind of relationship with any member of the opposite gender- which whether you are a feminist or not, you can't live in a homosocial world forever. my biggest critique of unisex greek orgs is that they create a culture where gender difference is emphasized and naturalized and its okay because you primarily interact with members of your same gender who to no surprise act out their gender in a similar way. they are like you in the way you dress, your eating habits, partying habits, and you share common space and activities which minimizes differences within the groups. the reality of life post-grad and even while we're still in school is that you can't not interact with people of the opposite gender. you have family members, classmates, professors, coworkers who are often not members of your gender, and even within your own gender, act very differently than you. narrowly defining femininity and masculinity restricts not only the individual, but how that individual is able to communicate with others. if we emphasized similarity, rather than essentializing difference, we could find new connections with all kinds of people of different genders, religions, races, ethnicities, sexualities, etc making our relationships stronger and a genuinely more connected community. also, under the assumption that most srat ladies and frat gents are not queer, how can you expect to have a meaningful, emotionally connected, long-lasting relationship with someone of the opposite gender when you have these deep-seeded ideas of difference in your mind?

third and finally, because i want this to be short:
deal with me. i look like a typical UVa woman. i wear my dark skinny jeans tucked into boots, the same silky scarf like everyone else owns, i even own a bag that i've seen at least 5 other women with. i love take it away (house it!) and i occasionally treat myself to a soy hazelnut latte at starbucks. i am also one of the most radical feminists you will meet and though my appearance may say otherwise, i am by philosophy a strong gender non-conformist. underneath my skinny express jeans, i have hairy legs that i have not shaved in a year and couldn't be happier with them. i am a history and swag major, looking to reclaim the radicalism of second wave feminism, and have been involved in feminist organizing since my first weeks at UVa. i am also very friendly, love meeting new people, and will make any party an 80s pop dance party in a heartbeat. in your eyes, i'm a wolf in sheep's clothing.
and one last thing: i also know a lot of men who hate bodo's coffee, and my partner (who is a man) introduced me to his favorite place on the corner, take-it-away, on our first date. i also own a pair of plain, brown, leather flip flops that i really like to wear on errands and have no idea who jack rogers is- do i somehow not count as female? and what about men who have serious relationships with women? these people are clearly invisible to you.


Nov 1, 2009

things i'm reading: sexual violence

quick couple of stories I think everyone should read:


from the parents of a girl gang-raped in CA: "Stop the violence... Please do not respond to this tragic event by promoting hatred or by causing more pain. We've had enough violence already in this place."

a yes-means-yes post: if she's not having fun, you have to stop.

and an immodest proposal from scarleteen: on sexual desire.

here's to ending rape culture, and promoting positive sexuality in the month of november,
-N

Oct 31, 2009

Happy Halloween!

This awesome feminist is dressed as Choice Avenger! woo!

Hey, feminists! Have a fantastic Halloween. If you're at a loss for costume ideas, try a feminist theme: Amelia Earhat, Blossom from the Powerpuff Girls, Wonder Woman, Xena, a Playboy Bunny (A LA GLORIA STEINEM!), Roseanne Barr, Angela Davis, Frida Kahlo, Storm from X-Men, Hillary Clinton... the possibilities are endless! Friends with XY chromosomes, what are some cool male feminist costumes?

In the mood for a fun feminist-y horror movie? Try Gingersnaps (a werewolf flick that parallels pubescent changes of adolescent girls with the changes of a fledgling werewolf - pretty interesting) or Teeth (a classic horror flick about Vagina Dentata). Zombie movies in general tend to run a little more feminist that most slasher films. Zombies are pretty much created equal. Good times, good times.

HAVE FUN! BE SAFE! <3

Oct 20, 2009

CNN + male psychologists blame suicide rate on bad mothers...what's new.

This is an important article about the terrifying prevalence of suicide and attempted suicide in the Latina community. However, as happens all too often, the published psychological study decides that the major reason for this issue is that Latina mothers don't understand their daughters. The article highlights what is assumed to be a typical story of a Latina girl, Francisca, whose mother is too busy working 3 jobs (their father is not in the picture) to correctly parent her daughter, causing the daughter to be depressed.

Francisca blames her mother for not paying enough attention, in the midst of working 3 jobs and raising 4 kids, to notice the depression. Psychologist Luis Zayas, explains that mothers are also busy trying to instill the cultural values of their homeland, instead of acknowledging the cultural realities of the US. What are the cultural realities of the US? Francisca ends up pregnant at the age of 14, at which point she readily admits that she now understands that her mom was making sacrifices for her.

Which makes me wonder - how do we reach the pseudo-scientific conclusion that this depression is the mom's fault? What about societal factors - the inherent racism and inequality in our educational system, the prevalence of anti-"illegal immigrant" rhetoric in our media, etc. But of course, these issues are not the reason that young Latina girls feel little self-worth. It's their mom's fault.

Oct 18, 2009

Film Reactions



Last Tuesday, we watched a documentary called The Greatest Silence: Rape in the Congo. It was a disturbing and moving film about the way rape and other forms of sexual violence are used as a war tactics. Due to time constraints, we weren't able to host a discussion about the film. But, we want to hear your reactions. What did you think? Did you know this was going on? Where else does this happen? What is the government [not] doing? What can we do? Leave a comment and let us know how you feel.

Oct 16, 2009

Hooray for Body Positivity!


Check out Feministing's post and video link about spoken-word poet Desdemona's new piece entitled "Too Big for my Skin." It's beautiful. Love your bodies, love yourselves!

Oct 15, 2009

Deadline for 'Zine Submissions!

UVa feminists! The deadline for 'Zine submissions is tomorrow, Friday the 16th. Send your artwork, poetry, and prose to femmag@gmail.com. At a loss for creativity? Rewrite the lyrics to a feminist song, digitally manipulate a modern Rosie the Riveter, narrate what it means to be a feminist at UVa... anything you want! We need your submissions! 'Zine production is always a lot of fun: greasy food, cutting up magazines, chatting with funny feminists... can it get any better? (No, no it can't.) The more submissions we receive, the more pages we have to design, and the longer we get to hang out during 'Zine Prod. :) We look forward to your submissions!